well i am a neophyte..

i am new in this thing called love
well i have never had a boyfriend and had never had a serious suitors.
maybe because i am not a pretty lady
but not really ugly
im just plain you know..
well
i am hapi just to be a very simple woman and a very contented one.
i will find hapiness one day with someone

i am angry..

i hate my friend.
he is so insensitive.
i cried hard and he did not say sorry sincerely.
i hope i could forget our friendship, i mean our close friendship.
he is a garbage!
i shall not forget that a gay friend is not worth keeping.
i hope everyone will realize that.
i hope someday he will feel the hurt i have felt.
i hate him.....

that pass by this can too

yes, everything in this world is ephemeral. the scene of this world is changing. now, i am happy to be me. i am contented and i dont want nothing else but to live this life i already have.i tell you i often wake up tired each morning when i sleep late in the evening. i slouch so much because i could not help but do it. my friends? i love them…but they say it is easier said than done. i dont want to be left behind. i prefer most that i will be the one who leave old things. let bygones be bygones. but still all good things come to an end.nothing lasts forever.but God loves us more than we ever know for the moment. i believe i shall have to live my life the way God wants me to.

but actually, i dont know what i am exactly saying ryt now.forgive me. i could sometimes i think all of the time i am little confused.it just that i dont want to tell it straight.

ryt now i want i want somebody who will take responsible for me as a rose. i am inspired by the friendship i have read yesterday.

i want to be honest with myself now. i want a rose to treat me more than a rose. i want him to let me bloom with smiles in summertime and in spring.

i do want to live like everyone else. i want to sleep under the blue sky. beside me is the rose i long to be more than that. i want to see the sunset with me in bloom with rose buds scent. and in the evening this rose never cease to tell of love by its color of pink. blush would it send to my foliage.

but why do all good things come to an end? they all linger in my thoughts but they disappear in my reality. it is indeed sad being in this situation when all you do is try to convince yourself that you are happy and you are somewhat the other side of the matter. i dont want to be bitter over pain. i have learned pain and now i am able to differentiate it from happiness. i want things as they are. maybe i am just contented. i wait all the time for changes. and the changes would sometimes bring shock to me. sometimes change is hard to accept. but we shall learn to accept it for it is the only constant thing in this world. yes, i can say this because this is what everyone else is experiencing….

a different kind of tale

C’est La Vie

Sitting by the corner of the student’s lounge, she had watched as the teacher passed by the corridor. She was thinking if she could talk to her professor. She had earlier known that their teacher rejected their project and all she wanted to do right at the moment was to confront her. She groped her stomach and felt it was empty. She sat there, thinking.

Yesterday, she had argued with the jeepney driver because he did not tell her that the truck was going to Bunawan and that she was actually going to Monkayo. She had raised her voice with too much exasperation. She had burned her finger with the still hot electric heater because her mind wandered somewhere when she was preparing her coffee. She had stumbled in front of their boarding house and was seriously embarrassed because her jeans were torn by the hem and her knee was terribly hurt. She walked limping down the school for three days already.

For several days now, she had slept very late at night and would doze into a sleep for quite an hour in the morning before eight o’clock in which her PE subject was scheduled. She had run out of money. She had encoded her project in a computer center where they charged her P15.00 per hour and she had spent more than eight hours to finish all her paper works. And she had also had the soft copies printed. She had texted her mother that she needed money but her mother did not know where to get it to send immediately to her.

She fixed her hair and put lipstick on her pallid lips. She thought she was still pretty even if she was over fatigued. She decided to really have a talk with the professor. But then she was suddenly talking to herself: “What will I tell her? Of course, I will tell her that she has to grade our project because I have no more money to spend for that crap… Could I really do that? Oh… Give me some strength.”

When she walked in the hallway, she felt her knee injury throb again and her flesh was trembling because of nervousness. Even in that state, she called out the name of her professor. The professor turned to her and faced her. She greeted her cheerfully and tried to conceal her apprehension. They were talking then when all of a sudden, she was already telling her professor: “Ma’am, can you not give us our grades? We worked hard for it and there you are just reject them in an instant without even appreciating or just thinking of our effort. Ma’am if you won’t accept it, then I would probably…”

The sentence was cut as she collapsed in front of her professor. She felt that somebody lifted her. She could not see the face. She could only hear voices. She knew that everyone was looking at her now. She wanted to open her eyes, but she could not. She felt gravely ashamed.

When she was back to consciousness, her head ached and she could barely sit up. Her mouth was so dry and her stomach was aggressively grumbling. She straightened up and looked for her things. She remembered she was supposed to have her soft copy of her project printed for submission. She looked at her watch. It was already nine o’clock. But when she looked outside the window, it was not yet dark. She pounded her watch hard on the bed and jumped out. She looked for her shoes and immediately left the clinic.

She forgot that she had collapsed in front of so many people awhile ago. She walked straight towards the Room 207 where she found her classmates nearly done with their examination. She approached her teacher and asked for a test paper. Her teacher would not allow her to take the test. She walked home alone and at a complete loss. She fumbled for her wallet in her bag. And in another minute, she forgot what she was looking for. She looked up at the big clock; it was still 3:00 in the afternoon.

When she passed by the lawn, she decided to take a seat for awhile. She waved a hand to a young guy seated a few meters away from where she was sitting. The guy wondered and walked out from the lawn. She laughed at herself. She then took out her notebook. She turned the pages and forgot where she wrote her class schedule and her things-to-do list.

The sky turned murky as dark clouds settled upon. She was still sitting there and scribbling something on her notes:

Dear Mama,

I talked to Professor Rico today. She would not accept my project. I confronted her and it feels good I have done it.

Ma, I did not eat for almost 17 hours. My head’s throbbing, my stomach’s empty, my knee hurts, and I could barely walk properly.

Ma, when I go home, cook something tasty for me. I miss you.

She started her way down the street. She was again feeling giddy. When she already arrived in their dorm, it started to rain hard. She went outside and bathed with the rain. She bathed until in the wee hours of the morning. She was drenched and tired and she wanted to go home.

Several years ago, everything was okay with her. She did not have to wash her clothes, make formal essays, skip breakfast, get nervous in the class, and get pressured on how to deal with peers. Back then, she only knew what her mother forbids her to do. She only thought of the chores which her mother assigned to her: watering the flowers in their garden, sweeping dried leaves in the yard, washing the dishes after every meal, brushing teeth before going to bed and whispering prayers before she closes her eyes to sleep.

She closed her eyes to sleep. She forgot to pray and slept tight while soaked in the rain.

art of war

Everyday, we face a battle. That battle is dealing with so much suffering in this world. Hence, it is very much important that we are able to equip ourselves with preparedness for this battle and develop the right attitude in order to win that conquest. Learning from Sun Tzu’s Art of War can be of help.

Firstly, Sun Tzu said that “if the enemy is secure at all points, one should be prepared for him. And if that enemy is in superior strength, one should evade the enemy.” Should I apply this to myself, it would mean not to be ashamed if I decide to surrender. If I can not do a certain thing very well anymore, it is just alright to give way sometimes. Accepting the fact that I can not be the best in everything I do is being brave. It would not make me less of a person.

“Though we have heard of stupid haste in war, cleverness has never been seen associated with long delays.” From this line, I have learned that it is of great advantage if you make no delay but never be in haste. Having the right timing is essential in war and in life. And pondering very well on what to do and how to do it is important in order to live life with less regrets and misgivings.

The “Art of War” has provided us how to win victory. “He will win who knows when to fight and when not to fight.” I think we must know when we will go into a battle. Know when to let go and when to fight and be able to know what a useless battle is. For me, this can be applied when you deal with conflicts among your peer. One should not be tactless but maintain composure. This would require you to have long patience. There is time to stop and think and just get some rest and gather back my senses.

               “He will win who knows how to handle both superior and inferior forces.” If I would apply this principle to myself, it would mean learning to handle the strengths and weaknesses.     I think it is imperative that one should acknowledge his strength and his limitation. This would make me think that I should develop more my potentialities and try to go beyond my limitation. For me, probably, I would venture into something that can be risky but at the same time I should ensure benefit from it or learn from it. It is good to give always a try. 

“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of hundred battles.If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.” These lines would be summed up that if you know both sides; you will win a hundred a hundred times in one hundred battles. We have to know ourselves before going into battle. It is also about knowing what the obstacles we may face and how to triumph over them.

“If equally matched, we can offer battle; if slightly inferior in numbers, we can avoid the enemy; if quite unequal in every way, we can flee from him.” Again, this means we should be able to know what course of fight we are going into. Probably, it is acknowledging our abilities and choosing the field in which we can do extremely well. It is important that we have this pleasure in our job and that can make you excellent in it.

“Ponder and deliberate before you make a move.” In every way, we must be careful. Our actions should be very well-thought. Think carefully and methodically. It is about having a strategy or plan, a purposeful one. In life, there are a lot of circumstances in which it requires you to plan things very well in order to achieve your goals.

“Do not swallow bait offered by the enemy.” I think this means resisting temptation to stop pursuing one’s goal. With endeavor, we push our way until we reach success.

“Do not interfere with an army that is returning home.” I think when an enemy surrenders or returns to where he comes from, let him go. The war is over when the enemy is not anymore resisting or fighting against you. So, when a friend of yours admits his mistakes, never try to enrage his heart with your loathsome query about his sincerity. “In order to carry out an attack, we must have means available.The material for raising fire should always be kept in readiness.” Be always prepared. They say life is full of surprises. So it is always proper to be always expecting the unexpected. This can have another meaning for me. It would mean to save a penny for the rainy season. Personally, I am a bit of a spend-thrift.

“The enlightened ruler lays his plans well ahead; the good general cultivates his resources.” This is again about the importance of creating plans and making them good as well as executing them. Having plans also means having a direction in life. I think I should be diligent enough to pursue my goals especially that I am graduating. I will look for a good-paying job and toil with it.

“Whoever is first in the field and awaits the coming of the enemy, will be fresh for the fight; whoever is second in the field and has to hasten to battle will arrive exhausted.” I think this line would tell me that it is always very favorable when you do things early or being punctual. It is as good as saying early bird catches early worm. This would also account to a popular nursery rhyme: “Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy and wise.” I believe nowadays people sleep late. As a result, they, feeling very tired, wake up late. They would fail to see the beauty of the morning sunrise and miss to breathe the fresh ions in the morning air. With punctuality, I should do my work and make it best. With promptness, I should grab good opportunities and make most of it.It is also about learning how to manage time, that there is time for everything. There is time for toiling and for doing the responsibilities and duties.

“O divine art of subtlety and secrecy!Through you we learn to be invisible, through you inaudible; and hence we can hold the enemy’s fate in our hands.” When we execute our plans, we should be subtle. In a competition, secrecy is important. As for me, this would tell me that I should not tell all. I should keep secrets to myself because in life there are actually secrets that can lead one to trouble. Things that are better left not said are better kept that way. Especially me, I have a lot of secrets that I think would be used against me. I am essentially a secretive person. Sometimes, I can be so detached from the people I deal with everyday. And by reading “Art of War,” it tells me that is indeed alright to be this way. This line would tell me that I should not let my enemies know my weaknesses or certain things which can be used against me. I think it is proper not to talk when one is not asked to I think it is very much appropriate to me. This tells me that I should try to conceal my fears. I should be tough even when I am shaking inside. I will not let them know I am afraid. And it also tells me that I should not reveal too much about myself. It is sometimes good not tell all the truth or all that you know of certain things. Sometimes, I should feign we are gentle but we are actually tough inside. Such things might be used against me one day.

“Art of War” tell me as well as there is always time for everything. There is time for joy and time for sadness. If it is time to go, then go. If it is not, stay where you are. Do not procrastinate. Get the job done before you can no longer do the job and all you do is submit yourself to compulsory. I think it also means not being lazy or striking while the iron hot.

queer in aimee bender's story

Aimee Bender’s story “On a Saturday Afternoon” is absolutely playful and inventive. This story is slightly surreal, wickedly fun, weird and deeply moving. Themes of the story are desire for connection, the ways loss gets expressed, and the hassles of break ups in a relationship.

“On a Saturday” is a story which is narrated by woman who has two male friends whom she had been together for at least three years. These three friends went to school together. The woman had even dated and flirted with the two men.

The woman had recently broken up with someone and she felt tired of the idea of meeting a new person because it would mean going through the same routine—saying the same phrases, big statements, grand revelations about her childhood and character. So she thought they will have to learn it from each other some other way. And it all happened on one Saturday afternoon when she had invited the two men in her apartment and drank beers. The two men said that they would do what the woman asks them to. And the woman held to that thought. Right there and then, she had asked the two men to touch each other’s hands and arms and later the two men kissed and kept kissing by her request. The two drunken men got naked while the woman kept watching them in that situation.

Later, the woman left the two men who were now sleeping. She went to her room and stayed there standing with the furniture of her dark room. It is only then that she feels the coldness of watching, the interminable loneliness. She realized that things among them will possibly never be the same again after that Saturday afternoon.

The text does not tell us what later happens to their friendship after that Saturday afternoon. It does not say to us what have become of the two men. It does not let us know whether the woman has asked for an apology or not. Does she even become more mischievous to the point that she teases the two men? The text does not acquaint us what are exactly in the minds of the two men when they were making love to each other. What have they felt for the woman afterwards? And what changes take place in their lives and personalities?

By using queer approach, we consider that the writer’s gender is female. Bender has written a woman perspective of two men kissing, touching every part of each other’s body and naked, sleeping side by side.

Basically, the women of Bender’s stories often engage in behavioral transformations that can be construed as both self-empowering and self destructive. Such contradictions are ubiquitous in Bender’s work, and they reveal Bender’s willingness to explore the complexity of the female psyche.

The characters in the story have different gender and sexual identity. Since there are two men in the story, they are normally males and having masculine identity. The gender of the woman is of course female and she exhibits feminine behavior. But the two men did something that deviate from the norms of the society. The two men kissed and were naked while snuggling each other’s body. The two men were real men but they took pleasure with having touched the body of their same sex. They were even both aroused. The two characters were not gays but they have done something that only gays do. They were not gays because they actually have had crushes on the woman they were with during the time they have done it. The two men have masculine behaviors as they have had first kiss with their first girlfriends. They play soccer, a sport only men can do for it requires agility and masculinity.

The text challenges the notion of “straight” ideology. The heterosexual in the story is the woman who narrates the events which took place on that Saturday afternoon. But in her stream-of-consciousness narration, she makes her own identity blurry as she made mention about women kissing each other. Is it not this woman a lesbian or having the inclination of having sexual desire towards her same sex since she is tired of meeting a new person and be in a relationship with the opposite sex? But when she showed her breast to the two naked, drunken men, she was conscious of her female identity that she is a woman capable of satisfying pleasure of men. She is aware of their biological made up of their bodies.

The two men continued kissing and were taking pleasure in what they were doing as if they were not intoxicated. They were subconscious. According to Freud, we have hidden desires and we continue conceal them because we are conscious of the norms which are socially constructed. Might be these two men have held of the fantasies having sexual activity with that of the same sex? Although, they were intoxicated, they knew a little of what they were doing. They even felt tension and fright while they do whatever the woman tells them to do. One thing is that they obviously took pleasure with what they were doing.

The woman’s objective in letting the two men continue kissing in front of her is that she found the two men beautiful, naked and she says their kissing was familiar to her. At first, the two men were unsure and were even reluctant. But they have made a deal. Like normal men, men of deeds, they did the things by the command of the woman. In this standpoint, feminist view is dramatic. A woman is giving orders to men. Men have nothing to do but follow as they are told.

It is obvious that in this text non-normative activity among the characters is within the text. The characters’ activity may have been the alternative form of their desire. The female character seems to take on a different perspective in watching her two male friends kissing intimately. She is unlike those girls who find it obscene and despicable. Instead, she is likely to have found an entertaining show. Her way of thinking is odd. That makes her queer.

Bender skillfully plots the characters in the story. First, she made a woman who is weary of the hassles of breaking up in a relationship. And then, she introduces two men, real men, who are half in love with this damsel in distress. Now, to please the woman, they had to do whatever the woman wants to them to do.

Understanding her personality means to discover her psychological condition. We can comprehend from the text that the two men serve as sort of the woman’s escape of reality. The reality is that the woman is now alone after breaking up lately with his boyfriend. With the two men beside her, she is at ease and does not feel the “interminable loneliness” which she suffered later as mentioned in the latter part of the text. By the presence of her two male friends, she feels reassurance.

Back to her emotional and psychological condition, the woman we have is going through pain by falling apart from the man she loves. Hence, the woman tries to solve her dilemma. Naturally, a human has a tendency to look for a solution for his trouble just like the woman in the text. She has a distinguishing personality of a fine female who espouses life circumstances. Consequently, her break up leads her to be indifferent with opposite relationship. She resolves to explore something different to beat her despair. She is then curious to same sex relationship. If she finds more gratification in it, then maybe she will be interested in it and indulge into it.

This writing of Bender somehow enlightens readers how people may undergo psychological changes in their minds as they face different trouble and endeavors in their lives which in a way or another affect the development of their personality. An individual naturally respond to his instincts and desires either positively or negatively. Their responses may be acceptable to the society or not. But who are we to judge? Nonetheless, everyone has the gift to make differences in his own life and in others.

edna st. vincent millay

Edna St. Vincent Millay is one of the greatest twentieth-century playwrights and poets. Unlike most poets who try to achieve and maintain by writing poems which are vague or filled with unnecessary verses and/or words, Millay uses ordinary words to describe one’s life most extraordinary and precious gifts, for example, love. Millay was admired as much for the bohemian freedom of her youthful lifestyle as for her verse. Her poetry was praised for its vitality and freshness.

Edna St. Vincent Millay (1892- 1950) had poems printed in St. Nicholas Magazine during her childhood on the coast of Maine, and published her first volume, “Renascence”, the year of her graduation from Vassar. The next five years she lived in the Greenwich Village section of New York City, supporting herself by writing stories under assumed names and acting with the Provincetown Players.

Serious critics condemned as flippant “A Few Figs from Thistles”, but the “gilded youth” of the twenties took it to their hearts. Her next volumes, “Second April”, “The Harp- Weaver”, and “The Buck in the Snow”, returned to the lyric vein of her earlier work and won wide popularity.

After her marriage she lived on a farm in New England. Her later books of poetry showed increasing concern with current issues but a corresponding decline in lyric appeal.

Flowing melody and an intense delight in the world of nature swept Edna Millay to fame with the poem “Renascence,” written when she was only nineteen, and the same qualities mark many of her short lyrics, such as “God’s World.” In other poems she dwells with equal intensity on the whole gamut of personal emotions, from the delicate wistfulness of “The Spring and the Fall” to the defiant grief of “Dirge Without Music.” Although she used a great variety of poetic patterns and also free verse, she achieved her finest expression in simple lyric forms and in the sonnets.

“Renascence” is written in traditional tetrameter couplets. It describes the poet’s dramatic spiritual awakening. The enclosed, childlike perspective of the opening section, “All I could see from where I stood/ Was three long mountains and a wood. / Over these things I could not see: / These were the things that bounded me,” soon gives way to a heroic effort to attain new horizons: “And reaching up my hand to try, / I screamed to feel it touch the sky/ I screamed, and– lo!—Infinity/ Came down and settled over me.” The young narrator subsequently experiences the sheer pressure of existence—“For my omniscience paid I toll, / In infinite remorse of soul. / All sin was of my sinning, all/ Atoning mine, and mine the gall/ Of all regret” —and finds refuge in death, underground: “Into the earth I sank till I/ Full six feet under ground did lie / …so gladly dead.” A youthful will to live and the reviving power of nature in the form of “pitying rain,” however, recall the transformed poet, who can now cry, “God, I can push the grass apart/ and lay my finger on thy heart!” the heightened spiritual awareness gained by the imaginative experience is shown in the final stanza, which is starkly contrasting in perspective to the first: “The soul can split the sky in two, / And let the face of God shine through.”

In “Renascence”, Millay not only found her poetic voice, but also established the philosophical, intellectual, and spiritual foundations of her entire oeuvre. The principal themes of Millay’s poem are death and resurrection. Millay describes death and rebirth as a lived, felt experience. Millay conveys profound poetic, even mystical, experiences to the reader through her masterful use of suggestive yet simple language and compelling imagery.

Another poem of Millay is entitled “The Spring and the Fall.” There are lines that rhyme, an element which are present in all of Millay’s poems. In “God’s World,” “Lament,” and “Renascence,” rhyming of lines are vivid.

Millay also wrote “God’s World.” This poem has apostrophe. Millay addressed the “world” as if a human, but the term “world” in the poem is actually a non-human.

Personification is also an element present in the poem. The “woods” were said to have ached and sagged. Rhyme is also flamboyant in the poem: “O world, I cannot hold thee close enough! / Thy winds, thy wide gray skies! / Thy mists that roll and rise! / Thy woods, this autumn day, that ache and sag/ And all but cry with color! That gaunt crag/ To crush! To lift the lean of that black bluff! / World, world, I cannot get thee close enough!” Another element in this poem is its solemn tone. Millay was as if talking to God, telling Him that the world is “too beautiful.” Imagery is also used in the poem such as “wide gray skies,” and “mists that roll and rise.”

Like in “God’s World,” the tone of “The Spring and the Fall” is also sober. Millay uses the flow of time or seasons of each year as a metaphor for moments of love, a version that recounts the hung ups and mood swings in a relationship. There is a narrative element since the poem tells of events which happened in the love affair of the persona with his “dear.” The poem first mentions that “in the spring of the year” her love broke her “a bough of the blossoming peach.” The second stanza reveals to us that her love “broke her heart, in little ways.” And the final stanza relays to us that she is hurting.

This poem has rhyming words in almost every end of the line in each stanza which makes its rhythm nice sounding. Millay uses also alliteration in this poem: “He broke me a bough of the blossoming peach…”

Another poem of Millay is “Lament.” In this poem, she uses ordinary words. But the message is meaningful. The line “life must go on” which is repeated three times in the poem down to the end serves as the theme. The persona was telling her children that their “father is dead.” By telling that, Millay put the words together without much further ado. The lines are straightforwardly explains that poverty comes after the death of the children’s father. We read: “From his old coats/ I’ll make you little jackets; / I’ll make you little trousers/ From his old pants.” The belongings of a person who passed away should actually be kept and not to be recycled. The final line “I forget just why” gives good reason for its title. The persona grieves and as a consequence she becomes confused and does not know any reasons for going on with her life.

In “Dirge Without Music,” Millay beautifully made a poem telling that she is “not resigned” to death. There is irony in this poem while the persona is actually recounting that death comes to “the wise,” “the lovely,” “the tender,” “the kind,” “the witty,” “the brave” and all other people but the persona: But I do not approve. And I am not resigned.” Alliteration is present in the lines: “With lilies and with laurel they go,” “be one with the dull, the indiscriminate dust.” And there is also rhyme scheme in this poem: “Down, down, down into the darkness of the grave/ Gently they go, the beautiful, the tender, the kind; / Quietly they go, the intelligent, the witty, the brave. /I know. But I do not approve. And I am not resigned.”

Millay is also well known in her day as a master of the sonnet. Many of her works showed great lyrical style in the Shakespearean sonnet form. This fixed form is characterized by the inclusion of two stanzas: the first being an octave with two quatrains; the second, a sestet composed of a quatrain and a couplet. The traditional themes of a sonnet usually revolve around the tormented lover. Millay perfected this “tormented lover” role in her sonnets.

In “Pity Me Not,” Millay uses the cyclical forces of nature as a metaphor for her version of the cycle of love, a version that concludes a man’s love for a woman always ends.

In the first two lines she looks at the sunset and one is reminded of the warmth love brings to life, warmth that naturally dies away as love fades. Next, she moves to beauty and the process of aging. As women get older, society often considers their beauty lost just as flowers wither as winter approaches. Millay seems to assume that men cannot love if the woman has no beauty left.

“The waning of the moon” can easily refer to the loss of romance and passion, since moonlight is often considered a sensuous setting. Finally, “the ebbing of the tide” washes away any remnants of romance. Passion’s tide will only go lower and lower from this point.

Millay finishes the octave directly tying up love to nature. Up to this point, love has not been explicitly addressed. Finally, she gets to the thrust of the poem, “Nor a man’s desire is hushed so soon, and you no longer look on love with me.” It is clear in this octave that Millay looks at the passing of love, the end of men’s desire, as a natural part of life. She seems resigned to it. She accepts it and declares, “Pity me not” the loss of precious things, for there is nothing else which could happen. With the tone of the octave, she clearly does not sound so much as a “tormented lover” as she does someone who has become completely jaded to love altogether. The torment is long finished.

As is common in many sonnets, the sestet introduces a new tone, a new twist to the narrative. In line 9, she tells directly that she indeed has gone through these stages of love enough to become resigned to the inevitable: “This love I have known always: love is no more.” Imagery is rich in this poem relating on the emotion of the woman like “fresh wreckage gathered in the gales.” The woman laments for she feels pain in her heart. She thought she was smarter than that but she succumbs to her emotions. And the paradox is the revelation: Pity her, her broken heart.

Basically, all of the poems of Millay have similarities in their themes. Major themes of Millay are inevitability of death and celebration of life or rebirth, for example, in “Renascence” “Dirge Without Music,” and “Lament.” She also wrote about love, particularly fleeting of affection in a relationship like “The Spring and the Fall” and “Pity Me Not.” She also wrote poems with some other elements such as imagery, alliteration, rhyme scheme, paradox, metaphor, irony and personification. But she mainly used ordinary words in expressing artistic messages in her poems. This makes her exceptional as a poet of the modern era.

a perfect day for bananafish (parody)

Wonder why I committed a suicide? Here is what I am to tell you: I do not fit into this life anymore! My life in the war has glutted me of a lot of terrible things which I have consumed throughout those years of exchanging of gun fires against the enemies, seeing people starve, holocaust, executions, bombings, deaths of my friends and a many thousand injustices in war. The devil did all these which make our world in which we live woeful. Now I have barely managed to live normally in this civilian life people are satisfied with.

My wife does not care for me at all. She stays in our hotel room and keeps up with all her vanity. Last time, I asked her if she has read the book I sent her from Germany. I found out she did not read it and perhaps she will never do. What has become of my wife? I forget now why I married her. She is unfeeling and dispassionate. Was married life good to us way back then? I could not remember why we sleep in separate beds.

Is she to be held responsible of my suicide? I believe she is to be blamed, but only to some degree. But nothing can dictate the heart whatever is it should do. My absence due to my enlistment in the army probably made her love for me fade. I understand her. Perhaps, my effort to win her back was not enough. And almost certainly, she thought that nobody comes out the same after the war. I think everyone else does not remain the same after the trauma which is brought by the war. One effect of postwar may be psychological desolation which later results to death. That is what exactly happened to me.

Those bananafish I told you were just like me. Like the bananafish, I lead a very tragic life. The bananafish’s habits are very peculiar just like what I was doing when I went out from our hotel room wearing a bathrobe and sat by the beach. Like the bananafish, I have swum into a hole where there were a lot of bananas and have become glutted with the awful things in the war. I got a banana fever and it was a terrible disease which affects my entire psychological system that I thought I might die. There and then I ended my life just like the bananafish which was killed in the hole where they squeezed in tightly that they died right there.

why write blog?

well my reason for writing blogs is that i want my thoughts be read by everybody..
but it is actually letting your "enemy" know your thoughts and therefore foresee your plans...
that is according to "ART OF WAR."
i dont really care if they know my thoughts. i want it this way.
its up to the one reading if he wants to figure out what i am really thinking.


i hope i make sense..